Monday, May 23, 2011

Capitalist or Socialist?

Capitalist or Socialist?

A young woman was about to finish her first year of college.

Like so many others her age group in college, she considered herself to be very liberal, and among other liberal ideals, was very much in favor of higher taxes to support more government programs, in other words redistribution of wealth.

She was deeply ashamed that her father was a rather staunch conservative, a feeling she openly expressed. Based on the lectures that she had participated in, and the occasional chat with a typical liberal professor, she felt that her father had for years harbored an evil, selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his.

One day she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the need for more government programs. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father.

He responded by asking how she was doing in school. Taken aback, she answered rather haughtily that she had a 4.0 GPA, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew. She didn't even have time for a boyfriend, and didn't really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying.

Her father listened and then asked, "How is your friend Audrey doing?" She replied, "Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, she never studies and she barely has a 2.0 GPA. She is so popular on campus; college for her is a blast. She's always invited to all the parties and lots of times she doesn't even show up for classes because she's too hung over."

Her wise father asked his daughter, "Why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who only has a 2.0. That way you will both have a 3.0 GPA and certainly that would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA."

The daughter, visibly shocked by her father's suggestion, angrily fired back, "That's a crazy idea, how would that be fair! I've worked really hard for my grades! I've invested a lot of time, and a lot of hard work! Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree. She played while I worked my tail off!"

The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, "Welcome to the capitalist side of the fence."

If anyone has a better explanation of the difference between capitalist and socialist or progressive or neocon I'm all ears. If you ever wondered what side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!

If a capitalist doesn't like guns, he doesn't buy one.
If a socialist doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a capitalist is a vegetarian, he doesn't eat meat.
If a socialist is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

If a capitalist is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a socialist is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a capitalist is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A socialist wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a capitalist doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Socialist demand that those they don't like be shut down.

If a capitalist is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A socialist non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced.(Unless it's a foreign religion, of course!)

If a capitalist decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A socialist demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a capitalist reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh.
A socialist will delete it because he's "offended".

Thursday, May 12, 2011

SARDARs Revealed..................

SARDARs Revealed..................

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Interviewer:
what is your birth date?
Sardar: 13th October
Which year?
Sardar: Oye ullu ke pathe _ _ _ EVERY YEAR

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Manager asked sardar at an interview.
Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it? 
Sardar replyed: -P-O-S-T-B-O- X.

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife,
Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
One tourist from U.S.A. asked Sardar:
Any great man born in this village???
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Lecturer: write a note on Gandhi Jayanthi
So Sardar writes, "Gandi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanthi.

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
When sardar was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver
adjusted the mirror. Sardar shouted, "You are trying to see my
wife? Sit behind. I will drive.

Fun  & Info @ Keralites.net
Interviewer: just imagine youare on the3rd floor, it caught fire
and how will you escape?
Sardar: its simple. I will stop my imagination! !!

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net

Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123to know current bill status
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Sardar: I think that girl is deaf..
Friend: How do u know?
Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Friend: I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!
Sardar: Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!!

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Teacher: Which is the oldest animal in world?
Sardar: ZEBRA
Teacher: How?
Sardar: Bcoz it is Black & White

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.
Manager: Do U know MS Office?
Sardar: If U give me the address I will go there sir.

Fun &  Info @ Keralites.net
Sardar in airplane going 2 Bombay .. While its landing he shouted: " Bombay ... Bombay "
Air hostess said: "B silent."
Sardar: "Ok.. Ombay. Ombay"

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Teacher: "What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?"
Sardar: "All are born on government holidays...! !!

Fun & Info @ Keralites.net
Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?
Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE